I WILL Make It

So on top of my dad's issues and my grandpa's issues I ruined a really good relationship, and my brother is in really bad condition.
I have to take care of everything, as I have talked about before.

Naturally, my dad's memory problems/dementia fall into the category of my responsibility.

I really don't mind taking care of people, I actually like to, it's just when I have to do EVERYTHING for everyone, I get overwhelmed.

So my dad only talks to me about his memory problems, and I have to just sit there and be strong for him, and everyone, and keep his secrets.

That's a huge fucking burden.

Then I'm dealing with the fact that my abusive grandfather is dying and my mom and her family are upset and all that comes with their father dying, even if he did what he did and they sweep it under the rug...

Then there's the person I got really close to and then freaked out and ruined anything that was good with them.

Oh, and then the very next day I found out my brother is rejection his heart and it can go either way...

It's safe to say I had a pretty fucked up couple months.

And yes I broke down when I found out about my brother, but that was the first and only time.

I am not a victim, and I will not let this get the best of me.

I am strong and have gotten through a lot of bullshit.

I can and will get through this, with a smile on my face.

Yes, I had a weak moment and messed some shit up, but it's not going to stop me, and I will fix what I have to fix.